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Issue: May Newsletter
Take the ONE Seat

By Kristin
Dear Community, some of you might have seen the interview I gave with CNN Money Switzerland recently. I felt the urge to share with you about the context of and the time before the interview.
A couple of month ago my parents both were challenged by health issues and I was called home to the house I grew up in. My parents themselves didn't ask me to come, but I felt strongly that it was time to return. To me this was a strong and challenging journey as I had been avoiding the place of my birth and much of my family grounds.

I had been working with my own inheritance as a German human being and also managed to deepen my connections with my ancestors, but the actual house I grew up in and the atmosphere in my family I had avoided for many years. So here I went back to the place of my childhood, the old trees in my parents’ garden were greeting me tall and strong.

It was a humbling time – facing my parents diseases and connecting with my brother and sister to find out what was needed and how to bring change into a stagnant situation. I was fearful, worried and I called into this community, called my teachers, supporters and friends to help me through this passage. I received a lot of help! Thank you! In some way I was believing that if I was going back home, I would be transformed back into my old self, into the one that I had been 25 years ago, before I started my journey with Yoga, Meditation and Dance.

I went to my parents’ home four times in four month and although the time was challenging I did not fall back into old familiar habits. I felt that all life was calling me to be the one I am, to actualize myself in this very moment while I was dealing with vulnerable family members and health care professionals. The trees outside kept whispering: "Go on, Kristin, just be yourself. Speak up, breathe, expand!" A few times I ran into the forest behind my parents house and up the hills with the old apple trees and cried my heart out from fear and worry. My strong and active parents, children of the second world war, had become old and fragile. I am the adult here, I am now full of life, and I am responsible. The sky seemed to be wider, vast in its invitation to me: "Grow up, dear One, there is no other way, just be yourself!“ I felt the incredible support coming form the spacious sky.

I had conversations with my parents about their childhood and sensed how much of the unprocessed grief was transported through the atmosphere and between the lines to us children unconsciously. There was no language for the shame, fear and loss that my parents had to grow up with. I read the books of Sabine Bode who also created the term: ‘Grandchildren of the war’. I realized, I am one of them. I always sensed much pain and tension in my childhood although everyone was well and things were OK on the surface.

As a child I communicated with ghosts of the war unknowingly and I realized that this was also the reason why I ran away and looked for my healing elsewhere. Now is the time of coming home and embracing this origin, my parents, the old house, the big trees in the garden, my brother and sister. And in this return I received much love and respect. I received a kind of blessing that can only come from ones own roots. It felt like leaning back into the one I am. And while I do this my family starts to relax too. Nothing is fixed, none of us is getting any younger and yet there is a deep acceptance unfolding in my heart.

Just before returning to my family in Basel after Easter I received a short Email from CNN, asking me about Movement Medicine and whether I would give an interview about this work. My dad and I were joking about the Email: “Just now as everything is falling apart, someone invites me into a TV studio? Life is ironic!“ He smiled at me, his eyes radiating. Trusting my competence. His joy and humour has always been a blessing. His love for music has carried me through my childhood until today. I remember the times as a child, feeling hidden pains and sadness, playing the piano was my remedy, soothing the nameless pain of the past. My father made sure his children would know how to play an instrument.

My Parents

Later through my long journey with Yoga and physical practices I felt the deepening of healing when I would move with music and treat my own body with the blend of movement and sound. Through Movement Medicine it became possible for me to be in touch with my body, incarnate, become a physical being. My love for music was attracting me to this work and the wonderful guidance of Ya’Acov and Susannah over many years was leading me home, back into my body, into my heart – helping me to find ground for my mind, for my imagination and for the seeing with my inner eyes. In the circles of community, of sharing, opening and learning about patterns and habits of myself this healing was possible. It is in the sharing and working together that we uncover and become ourselves.

Sensing my mother being fragile and needing help with every day activities humbled me. Her father was badly injured in the second world war, she knew her father only as an injured man. She herself is injured and often in danger to fall. When I was young, my mum was incredible in her creativity and life force. Her love for art was her mission. Her need to bring some beauty into the world was existential. It took me years to understand how I relate to art and culture, what it does to me and I found out that the healing aspect of art was the thread that fascinated me most. My life has always circled around healing and medicine, it feels like a call of my ancestors. There is so many ways to engage with this world and with our own story. Some of us find their healing in painting or drawing, as others find it in writing, playing music, creating sculpture, dancing, theatre, singing and composing.

My mothers dedication to art and her confidence stays with me. She called onto my inner warrior. It took years to unfold the dancing warrior qualities in my dance and befriend the power she affirmed in me. Just before I went into the studio for the CNN interview I felt her inside my bones: "Go on then, speak up, be the women you are." While I was talking to Amanda, the interviewer, I observed my mind and felt the need to update my attitude. She was kind, intelligent and supportive in her presence. I did not have to fight. I realized the actual Here and Now is welcoming me, is talking to me. There is no need to carry out fighting from some old story that is not true any more. I started to feel equal and talked to her as an equal, trusting life and the unfolding in our conversation.

This moment of realizing the actual Here and Now is happening to me more often. The great attraction I felt to meditation and the wise teachings of Buddhism is becoming more real in a day to day experience. I am here, breathing, allowing myself to be in my body. Leaning back into myself. As Jack Kornfield once said to me: “Take the One Seat“. What I sense is that through all practices like dance, breathing, therapy and art we bring ourselves to this One Seat, step by step. Being here now. With much respect for the past, the life of our ancestors as well as the life of future generations.

I am very grateful to be able to share this story and interview with you and want to express my gratitude for all the years I was invited to dance, communicate and share with many of you. I needed this growing place, this protected, magical garden for my own healing and it helped me to grow up so I could return home to my roots. My deep gratitude to Ya’Acov and Susannah for being outstanding and challenging teachers since I have known them. All my friends and peers, I love you. Let us stand strong, embrace our roots and origins, and dance!

Kristin

Here is the link to the CNN interview with Kristin, very worthwhile watching.

Kristin is a wonderful Movement Medicine teacher with many offerings. Here are some links to more of her work – from weekly dances to ceremonies and women-dance-gatherings:
Tanznetzbasel
Frauenkrafttage
(Women-Dance-Gatherings)
Movement Medicine Germany

Photo credits:
Kristin: Jutta Panke
Kristin's Parents: Lutz Glenewinkel

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The views expressed here do not necessarily represent the views of the School of Movement Medicine. Roland Wilkinson, Nappers Crossing, Staverton, Devon TQ9 6PD, UK Tel & Fax +44 (0)1803 762255 http://www. schoolofmovementmedicine.com